Rev. David Holwick H Pulpit Exchange at
First Baptist Church Holy Wisdom Byzantine Catholic Church
Ledgewood, New Jersey
February 21, 1993
Matthew 6:14-15
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"For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly
Father will also forgive you.
But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not
forgive your sins."
I. Are you a forgiving person?
A. Forgiveness is easy - in the abstract.
A couple of days after President Kennedy was tragically gunned
down in Dallas, Texas, a Presbyterian church from the
state of Michigan wrote to the wife of Lee Harvey Oswald.
They had heard that she wished to stay in America and learn
the English language.
They took it upon themselves to write to her and invite her to
come to their community.
They would help find her a home so that she might get a fresh
start on a productive life.
Unfortunately, many persons both in the local community and
from around the nation got wind of this plan and began
writing many critical letters about their offer.
One person probably described the situation most correctly
when she said,
"I never heard of a church doing anything like this before."
She knew that forgiveness is not often found even in a group
of believers who should best be called "sinners anonymous."
Forgiveness comes hard.
The minister began the painstaking job of answering each
unkind and critical letter that came across his desk.
With great sensitivity he wrote each person a letter sharing
that he understood their feelings and emotions about their
efforts on behalf of Mrs. Oswald.
However, he ended each letter by sharing, "There is only one
thing you have not shown us.
"What have we done that would not have been done by our Lord
and Savior Jesus Christ?"
Yes, forgiveness is never easy, but it is always the will of God.
#2234
B. Are you a forgiving person? A test:
1) Does memory of how someone hurt you still stir up pain?
2) If that person were sitting beside you this morning, would
the Communion bread get caught in your throat?
II. Forgiveness is hard, but unforgiveness is even harder.
A. Physical and psychological effects of bitterness.
B. Application to Bosnia - TV report on hatred being implanted
in kids.
C. Forgiveness causes pain, but spares later pain.
Walter Wangerin writes concerning forgiveness in marriage:
"Forgiving will not immediately soothe your pain.
Instead, it introduces a different pain, a much more hopeful
pain because it is redeeming.
You do "deny yourself" and die a little in order to forgive.
Pride dies. Fairness dies.
Rights die, as do self-pity and the sweetness of a pout or
the satisfaction of a little righteous wrath.
You die a little, that the marriage might rise alive."
#2105
III. Is forgiveness a matter of tit-for-tat?
A. Sounds like our forgiveness buys God's forgiveness. Matt 6:15
1) Or that he is petty, and won't forgive unless we do.
B. God's forgiveness does not depend on ours.
1) We cannot earn forgiveness, or salvation, by anything we do.
2) But only forgiven people can truly forgive.
3) If we cannot forgive, God's forgiveness has never lived in us.
a) Those who cannot forgive are making a bald statement about
their spiritual condition.
b) General Oglethorpe, to whom the young John Wesley was
chaplain in the colony of Georgia in America, once said
to Wesley with great pride, "I never forgive."
Wesley replied, "Then I hope, sir, you never sin."
#303
IV. How God forgives.
A. He forgets as well as forgives. Hebrews 8:12
1) As far as the east is from the west.
B. He forgives completely, and not just in part.
V. How we can forgive others.
A. God can help us forgive. Matthew 18:35
1) Keep in mind what God has done for you.
2) Keep things in perspective - our sins vs. their wrong.
3) God can give power when we feel weak.
B. Bear in mind the other person may be unaware.
1) They may not realize what they have done, or how it has
affected you.
2) Jesus on cross - "Father, forgive them, for they do not
know what they are doing." Luke 23:34
C. Take a small first step. (Swallow your pride)
D. Don't expect miracles overnight.
In an article in "Guideposts," Corrie ten Boom told of not
being able to forget a wrong that had been done to her.
She had forgiven the person, but she kept rehashing the
incident and so, couldn't sleep.
Finally Corrie cried out to God for help.
God's help came in the form of a kindly Lutheran pastor.
"Up in that church tower," he said, nodding out the window,
is a bell which is rung by pulling on a rope.
But you know what? After the sexton lets go of the rope,
the bell keeps on swinging.
First ding, then dong.
Slower and slower until there's a final dong and it stops.
I believe the same thing is true of forgiveness.
When we forgive, we take our hand off the rope.
But if we've been tugging at our grievances for a long time,
we mustn't be surprised if the old angry thoughts keep
coming for a while.
They're just the ding-dongs of the old bell slowing down.'
And so it proved to be for Miss ten Boom. #1927
VI. Our forgiveness communicates the gospel in a powerful way.
A dramatic, real-life story that portrays this appeared in the
LOS ANGELES TIMES under the headline,
"Couple Meet, Forgive Slayer of Daughter."
A father and mother from Dearborn, Michigan, whose twenty-year-old
daughter had been brutally murdered, traveled to the prison
where their daughter's convicted killer was being held.
"We love this special person from the bottom of our hearts,"
the mother said.
"We harbor no hatred, no revenge."
Is this woman simply crazy?
"We had the normal human reaction of grief and anguish," she said.
"Didn't I have the right to be filled with red-hot hate?
But where would it have gotten me?
It wouldn't have gotten me my daughter back....
God led us on this journey.
You don't have to commit a horrible crime to be lost.
You just have to ignore Jesus Christ."
#1440
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SOURCES FOR ILLUSTRATIONS USED IN THIS SERMON:
# 303 "I Hope You Never Sin," by Stephen Travis in "I Believe In the
Second Coming Of Jesus," 1988, page 192.
#1440 "Couple Meet, Forgive Slayer Of Daughter," by Gordon Dalbey,
Discipleship Journal, #36; Article: "The Way Of The World, The
Way Of The Cross," Nov/Dec 1986, page 12.
#1927 "Forgiveness," by R. David Roberts of Johnson City, Tennessee, in
Leadership magazine's "To Illustrate..." section, Summer 1987,
Page 48.
#2105 "Forgiveness In Marriage," by Walter Wangerin, Jr., Discipleship
Journal, #46, Jul/Aug 1988, page 26.
#2234 "Do You Have A Forgiving Spirit?" by Rev. Eric Ritz, Dynamic
Preaching (www.sermons.com), Spring 1992 "A".
These and 26,000 others are part of a database that can be downloaded,
absolutely free, at http://www.holwick.com/database.html
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