Rev. David Holwick ZH Lord's Prayer series
First Baptist Church
Ledgewood, New Jersey
October 20, 1996
Matthew 6:12,14-15
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I. It is easier to receive than to give.
A. People crave forgiveness from God.
1) Book on Crusades - soldiers willingly gave their lives
because of promise from Pope of automatic forgiveness.
2) Popular theme in churches.
B. It is much harder for us to forgive.
Man with family troubles in community.
"I forgive because I'm not bigger than God, but
I'll never forget.
They won't get a dime from my will.
And if they come within 500 feet, I'm calling the cops.
II. Forgiveness is unnatural, unfair, and illogical.
A. Animals don't forgive predators.
1) Sharks eat dolphins, don't apologize. Dogs eat dogs.
2) Freud: "One must forgive one's enemies, but not before
they've been hanged."
B. Justice demands that wrongs be punished.
In 1994 a former pre-med student, Edward Summers, hijacked
two young men in a jeep near a mall in Nyack, New York.
He forced them out of the vehicle, had them lay down in the
snow, and shot them both in the back of the head.
Michael Falcone died instantly.
Scott Nappi survived to point out the attacker in court.
Summers was sentenced to 70 years to life in prison.
Scott Nappi says his life has been changed irreparably.
Friends and family avoid him.
He told the reporter he wanted to know about his attacker's
fate in prison.
"Has he been threatened? Has he been beaten up yet?
"I want to know if he's suffering yet.
"That's what I'd really like.
"I don't want him to go there and not be threatened.
"He's paying for what he did, but I want him to pay even more."
The reporter asked Nappi, "Can you see a time when you would
ever forgive him?"
"No, never. Never. Never, never."
#2998
C. We can identify with these emotions.
Philosopher Herbert Marcuse said,
"One cannot, and should not, go around happily killing
and torturing and then, when the moment has come,
simply ask, and receive, forgiveness."
1) We want pay-back.
2) One of main motivations behind return of death penalty.
III. Reasons why people don't forgive.
A. Forgiving opens us up to being hurt again and again.
1) Jesus put no limits on forgiving.
2) He made it a lifestyle.
B. Four basic attitudes associated with forgiveness.
1) "I won't."
a) For some, it an unforgiving heart becomes a lifelong
obsession.
b) The resulting isolation can drive us to forgive.
2) "I can't."
a) Some feel they have been hurt too much to forgive.
b) An unforgiving spirit cannot grow spiritually.
c) It takes much energy to maintain a bitter heart.
3) "I don't want to."
a) This may be most honest response, and is usually
conscious.
b) Some get pleasure out of being a martyr.
c) We cannot love if we cannot forgive.
4) "I'm willing."
IV. Why we need forgiveness.
A. Sin creates barriers.
1) Sin separates us from God, and from each other.
2) Once sin is dealt with, reconciliation and fellowship can
take place.
3) Sin doesn't disappear. It has to be removed.
B. Forgiveness is the only solution.
1) It is only way to break the cycle of blame and pain.
a) The drawback to justice - where does revenge end?
b) Bosnia and historical grievances.
2) Forgiveness doesn't settle all questions of blame.
a) It often evades those questions.
b) But it allows relationships to start over.
c) Only humans can forgive, and develop relationships
that transcend the law of nature.
C. Joseph and his brothers. Genesis 50:14-21
1) Joseph swings from harshness to blubbering sorrow.
a) He finally forgives them.
b) The sounds of his grief and love mingle together.
2) Forgiveness transforms both forgivers and forgiven.
a) Joseph's tears were a sign of liberation.
b) Forgiveness puts both parties on the same side.
1> Through it we realize we are not that much different.
V. Forgiveness is not an option.
A. We have to forgive others.
1) St. Augustine: If we pray with an unforgiving heart, we
are actually asking God NOT to forgive us.
a) He called it "the terrible petition".
2) C.S.Lewis:
"No part of his teaching is clearer: and there are no
exceptions to it.
He doesn't say that we are to forgive other people's
sins providing they are not too frightful, or
provided there are extenuating circumstances, or
anything of that sort.
We are to forgive them all, however spiteful, however
mean, however often they are repeated.
If we don't, we shall be forgiven none of our own."
B. If we will not forgive, we are not Christians.
1) When God's grace comes in our hearts, it makes us
forgiving.
2) If I refuse to forgive, I have never understood the
grace of Jesus.
C. Forgive to be forgiven?
1) Sounds like a tit-for-tat arrangement. Matt 6:14-15
2) Makes forgiveness a work that forces God to choose us.
3) Forgive because forgiven.
a) Chuck Swindoll:
"The extent to which you can envision God's forgiveness
of you, to that same measure you will be given
the capacity to forgive others."
#3038
VI. The ability to forgive comes from God.
A. Forgiveness and reconciliation defy human reason.
1) God's gifts are generally this way.
2) Instead of requiring us to forgive, he grants us the
privilege of doing it.
B. In the final analysis, forgiveness is an act of faith.
1) We forgive because love is stronger than sin and hatred,
and because God empowers us to impart it.
2) We trust that God is a better justice maker than us.
a) This is reason forgiveness is not unjust. Deut 32:35
VII. This petition is for religious people.
A. We can be faithful in church, live a life of negation,
and hold a death grip on our grudges.
1) We need to take an inventory and ask if we really know
Jesus.
2) Bitterness and hatred can still linger or recur.
B. If we are Christians, we can and will ultimately forgive.
1) It requires no elaborate reasoning.
2) A forgiving spirit should be our badge as Christians.
Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.:
"Forgiveness is not an occasional act;
it is a permanent attitude." #3608
VIII. God's character must become our character.
A. Our God is a gracious, forgiving God. Micah 7:18-19
A captive was once brought before King James II of England.
The King reprimanded the prisoner:
"Don't you know that it is in my power to pardon you?"
The scared, shaking prisoner replied, "Yes, I know it is
in your power to pardon me, but it is not in your nature."
The prisoner had keen insight to know that unless a person
had a spiritual rebirth, we have no nature to forgive.
#2238
B. We are never more like God than when we forgive.
1) Only God can change our hearts to become like His.
C. The cure must be applied one person at a time.
Mamie Mobley's only son was visiting relatives and friends in
Mississippi one summer in 1956.
Outside a general store, with boys playing games on the front
porch, eleven-year-old Emmett decided to go into the store
and buy some bubble gum and some candy.
As Emmett and some other boys came out of the store someone
asked Emmett, "How'd you like the lady in the store?"
Emmett whistled his approval.
Someone nearby heard his whistle and did not like an African-
American whistling at a Caucasian woman.
It was 2:30 a.m. the next Sunday when two men stormed into the
house where Emmett was staying and took him at gun point.
Three days later they discovered his badly beaten body.
I've been told the hardest thing in the world is losing a child.
Years after the tragedy she was asked,
"Don't you harbor any bitterness toward the two men?"
Mamie's reply reveals the depth of her faith:
"From the very beginning that's the question that has always
been raised.
What they had done was not for me to punish and it was not for
me to go around hugging hate to myself, because hate would
destroy me.
It wouldn't hurt them. I did not wish them dead.
I did not wish them in jail.
If I had to, I could take their four little children and I could
raise those children as if they were my own and I could have
loved them."
I believe the Lord meant what he said, and [I] try to live
according to the way I've been taught."
Through this terrible ordeal she can honestly say,
"I haven't spent one night hating those people." #2715
IX. Forgiveness can be a powerful weapon in the making of peace.
A. Forgiveness is hard, but hate is harder.
B. Who do you need to forgive?
C. Ask God to help you.
(Study notes are extensive, but omitted)
Copyright © 2024 by Rev. David Holwick
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