Matthew 1:18-21      Mary: Beyond the Shame

Rev. David Holwick   ZM                        Women of the Incarnation, #4

First Baptist Church

Ledgewood, New Jersey

December 22, 2013

Matthew 1:18-21


MARY: BEYOND THE SHAME



  I. One of the most controversial pregnancies in history.

      A. It happened in a country on the Mediterranean.

          1) Her name wasn't Mary, but Ingrid.


             Ingrid Bergman was one of the most famous actresses in

                America in the 1940s and 1950s.

             She starred with Humphrey Bogart in "Casablanca."

             She played a nun opposite Bing Crosby in "The Bells of

                St. Mary's."

             Her publicists promoted her as the perfect, wholesome

                beauty whose admirable personal life matched her talent.


             Then Bergman met Italian director Roberto Rossellini.

             She left her husband, openly moved in with Rossellini in

                Italy, and got pregnant.

             She later divorced her husband and married the director but

                the damage was done.


             Her movies were picketed.

             A senator denounced her as a "free-love cultist" and

                "a powerful influence for evil."

             Her career suffered for decades.                     [1]

                Even my mother thought the affair was scandalous.


          2) Mary could have related.

              a) She wasn't as blatant as Bergman, but the shame would

                    have been more intense.

              b) Mary lived in a culture that used shame as a fierce

                    weapon.

              c) One public mistake and you were ruined for life.

              d) How would you have handled Mary's situation?


      B. Reputation isn't everything.

          1) It matters a great deal, but in the end it is based on

                human perceptions.

              a) Only God knows the heart.

              b) God also knew what he wanted to do on earth and he

                    chose this simple peasant woman to bring it about.

          2) Mary's faith and obedience in the face of public rejection

                is something we should contemplate.


II. It may not have been public shame she was worried about.

      A. Some scholars believe pregnancy before marriage was acceptable.

          1) Mary and Joseph were betrothed (=engaged) and in Jewish

                culture this was a legally binding arrangement.

          2) Later rabbis said that a future groom who had sexual

                relations with his bride-to-be at her father's house

                   was not guilty of immoral behavior.             #64317

          3) The Bible never allows this, but perhaps the looser practice

                of later times was done in Mary's day.


      B. One person wouldn't buy it.

          1) Even if society would have assumed Mary's pregnancy was

                OK, there is a person who would not - Joseph.

          2) He figured that she had gotten pregnant by another man.

              a) In his eyes, his fiancée was an adulteress.

              b) Even in our lax standards today, this would derail

                    the wedding.

          3)  This explains Joseph's decision to divorce her.

              a) Divorce was the legal remedy for adultery.

              b) You can tell that Joseph is a decent guy because he

                    wants to do it quietly.

              c) He doesn't want to expose her to any more shame than

                    is necessary.

          4) It took God's direct intervention to save the marriage.

              a) An angel assures Joseph that Mary is acceptable.

              b) The pregnancy is a miracle from God.

              c) Perhaps it is a miracle that Joseph believed it!


III. All that matters is what God thinks.

      A. Shame is very subjective.

          1) What might shame one person, makes another proud.

              a) One of the most scandalous aspects of Ingrid Bergman's

                    affair was that she didn't hide it, and she didn't

                       care what others thought about her.

              b) At the end of her life she said she did not feel she

                    did anything wrong.

          2) Sensitive people feel shame even when they are in the right.

              a) Just the thought that other people may have a bad

                    opinion of them bothers them to no end.

              b) Unfair judgments can be especially cruel.


      B. God knows the truth.

          1) He knew that Mary was virtuous.

              a) This doesn't mean that she was perfect - she herself

                    acknowledged that she needed a savior.      Luke 1:47

              b) She never focuses on her own attributes or strengths.

                  1> Instead, she puts all her focus on God.

          2) God found out that this girl had great faith.

              a) Mary comes across as a warrior of God.

              b) She knows that God is going to redeem her nation.

              c) She humbly accepts the mission God gives her, even

                    though she doesn't fully comprehend it.


IV. Mary's faith was tested.

      A. At Jesus's birth, she was told a sword would pierce her soul.

          1) Simeon, a prophet, told her this.                    Lk 2:35

          2) It may have happened even before the crucifixion.


      B. Her son seemed to distance himself from her.

          1) She expresses a motherly concern at the wedding in Cana

                and got turned down by Jesus.                    John 2:1

              a) "Woman, why do you involve me?"                 John 2:4

          2) Nevertheless, she tells servants to obey his every command,

                then she shifts to the background.


      C. She tried to "rescue" Jesus when he was overwhelmed by crowds.

                                                      Mark 3:20f; 3:31-35

          1) She was concerned about his health.

              a) Jesus seems to say she's not concerned about God's will.

          2) Physical relationship to Jesus does not confer blessing,

                but radical obedience to God's message does.


      D. She watched her son die on a cruel cross.             John 19:25

          1) Mary was among the few who did not abandon him.

          2) Jesus entrusted her to the apostle John.


      E. She may have missed Easter, but she was there for Pentecost.

          1) There is no clear statement that Mary saw the empty tomb.

              a) We can't be sure because several Marys are mentioned.

          2) What we do know is that she received the spirit at Pentecost.

              a) Her whole family finally came to see Jesus as their

                    Savior.                                     Acts 1:14

              b) They now worshipped him instead of mocking him.


  V. What does the world think about you?

      A. All of us have done shameful things.

          1) Perhaps you have something in your past that humiliated you.

              a) For years it defined you in people's eyes.

              b) Some people still see you that way.

          2) Maybe it was never broadcast, but you lived in fear that

                it would be.

              a) You might feel this way about a sin right now.

              b) It can be a paralyzing thought.


      B. God can look beyond the shame.

          1) He knows what you have done, but he also knows what you

                can become.

              a) He sent Jesus so we could all be made clean.

              b) Anything we have done can be forgiven.

          2) It is not your past actions but your present attitude.

              a) God wants to find people with humble spirits.

              b) People who are willing to say, like Mary did,

                    "I am the Lord's servant."                  Luke 1:38

              c) If you tell him that, and mean it, he will give you

                    something to do.


VI. Make Mary's faith your faith.

      A. God calls each of us to a mission.

          1) Mary's mission was to give birth to the Savior.

          2) Our mission may be less dramatic, but equally important.

              a) Nurture your own kids to believe in God.

              b) Provide for the homeless, or support a foreign mission.

                  1> Comment by a father to me: "I wish my kids would

                        live for something beyond themselves.

                     Even if it is just a social cause, it would be

                        better than pursuing the almighty dollar."


      B. We must receive it in faith.

          1) God will give us signs that help us to believe.

              a) Would it be easier if we were visited by our own angel?

              b) I don't think so - angels give tough messages!

              c) But God will give us something to show us the way.

          2) There will be many things we won't understand now.

              a) We don't believe when we have all the answers.

              b) We believe when we trust in the One who does.


      C. Can YOU say to God, "I am your servant"?

          1) It is not a willingness to do great things.

          2) It is a willingness to do GOD'S things.



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SOURCES FOR ILLUSTRATIONS USED IN THIS SERMON:


[1] The Birth of Tabloid Journalism: The Ingrid Bergman - Roberto

       Rossellini Scandal, by Rose Field, Yahoo Contributor Network,

       September 14, 2007.


#64317  The Real Problem With Marys Baby Bump, by Lynn Cohick,

           December 18, 2009; <http://www.christianitytoday.com/women/2009/december/real-problem-with-marys-baby-bump.html>


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